Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

View previous topic View next topic Go down

Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Adreas on Fri Oct 07, 2011 9:39 pm

Name: Adreas Ryin Shakiri

Gender:Male

Race:Elf

Age:18

Birth place:Dalish Camp

Hair colour:dirty blonde

Eye colour:blue/indigo

Physical description:Ryin stands to be around 5'0, he weighs only 135 lbs. He is a good sized elf, yet an elf none-the-less. Ryin's hair is shaggy, dirty blonde. His skin is tanned from the many days he has spent in the sun. His physique is fit from his extensive training as a Dalish rogue warrior. He typically wears no shirt, only a pair of brown pants to cover the necessities. Around his neck hangs a necklace, passed down from his ancestors, it is a reminder of where he came from.

Class:Rogue

Specialisation:Dual wielding.

Prominent skills/spells:sneak, swordsmanship, bows, etc.

Occupation:Currently none.

Biography:

Twas yet another bright day in the Dalish camp. Generally the people of the elven community were happy, they were simple farmers, merchants, hunters, and yet still some were Rogues apart of the militia of the camp just in case they were needed.

In the camp there was quite a lovely elf, her name was Agape. She was sweet and kind to everyone...yet not everyone thought so kindly of her. One night, a horrid act of crime was commited, but she would never tell. A stray elf...who acted more like a dog...came into her hut...and took advantage of her. His drunk intensions were of pure evil from the depths of hell itself. He threatened to kill her if she ever dreamed of uttering a word about the unfortunate events. It would only be called fate itself to say that the next day that same drunken dog who had the audacity to call himself a Dalish Elf was raped by a pack of wild mabari and then eaten by that same pack...funny how things come back around.

Agape still told no one of the crimes that were taken against her, but in time her body told the tale as she had become pregnant. Her spirits were not shattered. She thanked the Creators for the life that was entrusted to her. It mattered not to her how this little one came to be created, only that the young elf would be hers.

Nine months passed and Agape gave birth to a healthy baby boy. His name would be Adreas Ryin Shakiri. She raised him with much love and compassion, as any Dalish Elf Lady would.

Unfortunately all good things must come to an end. Agape was at a ripe old age when Ryin was merely 15 years old. He prayed that the Creators would spare his mother's life, but his prayers were selfish. It wasn't long after that the Creators called Agape forth to come home, to rest in eternal peace.

Ryin was at first filled with raging anger. He didn't understand why his mother had to be taken, but eventually he would grow to. It was only then that he joined the Dalish militia and began training. It has been three long, struggling years since his mother's death that he has been training night and day, countless hours to become the Dalish man that he was today.

One day, the unfortunate events exploded around him again as the Darkspawn attacked his village. The Elder ordered Ryin and a small band of others to leave the village immediately as there was no possible way to defeat the Darkspawn...not in the malicious numbers in which they came.

It was then that Ryin began to grow bitter...he wondered if he had been stricken with a curse...why was everything falling apart? Why did everything have to go wrong? Why did the Creators seem to ignore his prayers? He was once again filled with anger and rage...forced to live off of the land, survival of the fittest as they say. Ryin grew to be quite a dangerous hunter...a force to be reckoned with. He made it his goal to kill every hellish fiend that called itself a Darkspawn. Such an angry passion gave birth to his journey...





Last edited by Adreas on Sat Oct 08, 2011 10:46 pm; edited 2 times in total
avatar
Adreas
Nug

Posts : 18
Join date : 2011-10-07

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Adreas on Sat Oct 08, 2011 10:01 am

Sorry for the double post, but I've completed my app.
avatar
Adreas
Nug

Posts : 18
Join date : 2011-10-07

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Halinu on Sat Oct 08, 2011 11:45 am

Hey there! It's mostly all good; I just have a few concerns.

The Dalish mostly worship the Creators, do they not? I mean, it's POSSIBLE that some Dalish would prefer to worship the Maker, but very unlikely since they were ousted from their homes and persecuted in an Exalted March by the Chantry.

Rape and brutality is something that is very real and even actively implied within the Dragon Age series. As for interspecies rape... I'm not sure how often/if it comes into play in terms of humanoid vs animals. I'm not sure how often savage, wild animals have to urge to sexually exploit their prey? I think that's more of a humanoid trait of humiliation and sexual desire and deviance. I can see him getting eaten/savagely mutilated/his junk getting torn to shreds, but rape via wild animal is a little farfetched in my mind.

I think those are my only concerns. I'm a little uncertain about elven pregnancy/fertility at an older age, but I can't really be sure so it doesn't matter so much. :] Sorry this is so long! I just like to explain why things don't make sense to me sometimes. This is a great app, though.
avatar
Halinu
The Mod of Many Mages

Posts : 221
Join date : 2011-03-30
Location : Canadaland

View user profile http://bloodandashes.canadian-forum.com

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Adreas on Sat Oct 08, 2011 5:06 pm

It could be possible for them to follow after the Maker or Creators, they have free will, though it is not 100% for sure which one they did follow, but as you said, possible.

As far as the Mabari rape scene in the history. I wanted the drunkard to go through the humiliation the same as Agape. I wanted him to truly pay for what he did. His junk could have been eaten off, but it would only prevent him from doing it again, this way, he truly experiences the events and the gravity of it. I know it is highly unlikely, and I would probably stretch that a bit and say that it was even impossible, but I just thought it would be an interesting add on.

The length doesn't bother me, no worries at all, it's your job to specify your wants/desires in an application such as this. As it is mine to correct it in any way addressed. I do appreciate you looking over it and I look forward to RPing here.
avatar
Adreas
Nug

Posts : 18
Join date : 2011-10-07

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Halinu on Sat Oct 08, 2011 6:35 pm

I was just pointing out the fact that the dalish very often prefer to worship their Creators as oppposed to the Andrastian Chantry's view of a Maker because of they bloody past of persecution by the Chantry. Though they supported Andraste, they refused to be converted to the Chantry's views, in most cases. It may be rare for them to follow the Chantry's view, just like in dwarf's case, it is possible, given enough reasoning and it's of course, your choice.

I understood your reasoning behind the mabari rape, but my case behind my objection still stands: I have never, ever heard of an animal raping a human and I still can't really see it happening, ironic plot device or no.
avatar
Halinu
The Mod of Many Mages

Posts : 221
Join date : 2011-03-30
Location : Canadaland

View user profile http://bloodandashes.canadian-forum.com

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Adreas on Sat Oct 08, 2011 10:44 pm

I'll adjust it to say the Creators, you are right.

Like I said, it's not likely that wild Mabari would inflict sexual torture on a human, and in reality it wouldn't happen, but it made sense in my mind where everyone gets what they deserve lol. It was just a silly add-on to the history. The history would have been fine without it, I just wanted to give a brief overlook of what happened to the drunkard. It does nothing to build Ryin's story as he wouldn't be aware of that happening to his mother's rapist.

Is there anything else I need to change or add-on to?
avatar
Adreas
Nug

Posts : 18
Join date : 2011-10-07

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Halinu on Sat Oct 08, 2011 11:54 pm

Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. I guess some of what I said came off as pushy. Sometimes I get a bit obsessed with making things super realistic (in a fantasy world no less!) and tend to forget that people put their creativity into their characters. You are right, that it has no bearing on his character at all, so aside from my initial mention of it, there was no point in being nitpicky.

Everything else looks great and it'll be nice to have an elf from a different cultural background floating around!

APPROVED!
avatar
Halinu
The Mod of Many Mages

Posts : 221
Join date : 2011-03-30
Location : Canadaland

View user profile http://bloodandashes.canadian-forum.com

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Adreas on Sun Oct 09, 2011 8:46 am

No worries Halinu, like I said earlier, it's your job.

I look forward to seeing how this character develops here. I'm about to post up a RP this morning.
avatar
Adreas
Nug

Posts : 18
Join date : 2011-10-07

View user profile

Back to top Go down

Re: Adreas Ryin Shakiri (Character) Complete.

Post  Sponsored content


Sponsored content


Back to top Go down

View previous topic View next topic Back to top

- Similar topics

 
Permissions in this forum:
You cannot reply to topics in this forum